DR. BROAD-DICK AND MR HUNK


Most people on the planet have a name. Like it or not, one’s name is the first tool one has to begin to develop their personal brand. People in the real world will associate your name with all the good and the bad stuff you do while telling everyone who you are. For the most part, I have been blessed with a good name – Mike Broderick. That’s the one I use most of the time when I deal with the public. I am Mike Broderick, the Spin Doctor, the Vocational Rehabilitation Counsellor, the once world famous archaeologist.

I do have an option, however. That option is used to tell people that I really screwed up this time. That’s right. I could be Michael. Michael is a name that is usually spit out in the form of an announcement that Michael has made some sort of an indiscretion. Did you leave the seat up again, Michael? Did you leave those drops of pee on the toilet seat again, Michael? I can take a map into the field and come back to the lab and use it as part of a final report. I give a map to Michael, and he uses it to clean his windshield, then wipes his ass with it.

Needless to say, I prefer to spend the day as Mike rather than Michael. My day is more thoughtful, exciting and fun. Michael, after all, was the kid in Grade four that was accused of making, “Another one of your Wild Guesses,” about the multiplication tables.

Then there’s my family name Broderick. One would think that would be relatively easy to deal with. I’m willing to bet that at least 20 percent of the guys named Rod in the English speaking world use Rod as the short form of Roderick. My name is pronounced the same way only with a ‘B’ in front of it. It should be easy. Mispronunciations are pronounced loudly, often followed by a snicker.

A few years ago, in an effort to discover more about my buying habits, a local supermarket signed e up for a loyalty card. Coincidently, they made all the cashiers say, “Thank you Mr. … and then they’d stare at my name … Borderwacker, … Borderich, … Bordahumper … etc.”

That was the year I self-published my book, “Awakening the Hunk Within.”

After ringing up my order, the cashier, who has the enormous mental capacity to memorize the numeric codes for all of the exotic and domestic fruits and vegetables in the place, said, “Thank you Mr. Broad-dick.”

“It’s a good thing I wasn’t buying condoms,” I said.

Then I had an idea. I walked over to the Customer Service desk and asked for a loyalty card application card. I filled it out using the name, ‘Mike Hunk’

Now I get, “Thank you Mr. Hunk. … Is that really your name?”

So I tell them the story of Dr. Broad Dick and Mr. Hunk. I can usually sell a book on shopping day.

Mike Broderick , a one- time archaeologist, is a Vocational Rehabilitation Counsellor with the Fraser Health Authority in Port Coquitlam where he helps people with mental health disabilities find and keep full or part time employment .

He WAS the Employment Specialist for the Neil Squire Society in Burnaby where he found employment for people with physical disabilities, A Supported Employment Coordinator at THEO BC (now the Open Door Group), and a case manager at Community Fisheries Development Centre where he helped people move from the fishing industry to something else because there, “Ain’t no fish.” This means he is VERY familiar with how a modern day resume should look.

He is a newly retired ambassador with the Vancouver Board of Trade and a former member of the Labour Task Force of the Burnaby Board of Trade He does some work as a field Archaeologist, is a fitness instructor and frequent contributor of fitness humour articles to Alive Magazine. He is always saying, “If you can’t be fit, you can at least be funny.”

He lives in Port Coquitlam with his spouse Cecelia. You can reach him at home at michael_broderick@telus.net  or at 604-464-4105. If you’re looking for a career change, he is the Spin Doctor and can give you a resume makeover at competitive rates

 

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2 Responses to “DR. BROAD-DICK AND MR HUNK”

  1. energywriter Says:

    Funny and so relatable. My former husband’s name was Cutright. You can imagine all the permutations of that.

  2. mikebroderick Says:

    Cut once, measure twice and cry

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