This morning, in honour of Valentine’s day, Ethen Fixell, the About.com Dating from the Male Perspective Expert published an article, “The 6 Worst Things To Do On A First Date.” (http://datingadvice.about.com/od/Meeting-People/tp/The-6-Worst-Things-To-Do-On-A-First-Date.htm?utm_source=cn_nl&utm_medium=email&utm_term=About%20Today%20Channel%20Newsletter&utm_campaign=todaysl&utm_content=20150214 ) As I read (and agreed with) all the tactics Fixell said about getting yourself into trouble on a first date, I couldn’t help but think about the similar perils that could keep you from getting hired in a job interview.
There are many similarities between dating and interviewing. They are both forums to strut your best stuff in an attempt to get lucky, they are both venues to determine whether there might be a chance that you will love each other, and they are both activities where you always win – you just never know what the prize is going to be.
Here is Fixell’s list:
1. Reek of desperation.
The trick to first dating is to find a medium ground between ‘like,’ ‘lust’ and stalking. You have to play it cool on the first date. When you say good night at the end of it all, don’t put your foot in the door to keep your date from closing it. Your date will let you know if there will be a second interview.
Regarding interviewing, I have always said that it’s easier to get a job when you have a job. I don’t mean to say that you should already have a date when you are on a date, but the fact is if you are employed, a lot of the stress and urgency of the need for a paycheque is reduced. Employers, like dates, can sense desperation, and it moves you down a notch or two on the short list for hiring if you are on your knees sobbing when the question, “Is there anything you want to know about us?” is asked.
Try to muster some dignity.
2. Fail to pay attention.
Turn off your cell phone, stop playing “Angry Birds” and keep your eyes off the server’s butt as she walks from table to table. Your date wants you to concentrate on her. I once knew a woman who would snatch a cell phone away from her date and start calling her friends in Europe. Show some class or get a huge phone bill
In an interview, turn off the cell phone. Show a little respect. After all, the only call you’re likely to get is from a bad date in Europe calling you while you’re trying to tell your prospective employer something about yourself.
Also, try to concentrate on making eye contact. You need a connection. Make it.
3. Don’t be a wet noodle.
Show some confidence blended with etiquette. Don’t be submissive or subservient. Show confidence.
In an interview, have a firm handshake, make eye contact, and speak in an authoritative voice – especially if you know what you’re talking about. Show that you can be decisive and have a “take no prisoners” attitude. Or any type to attitude.
4. Stay away from sex, religion or politics.
Save this for the second date.
Save this for the second interview.
5. Don’t reveal too much.
On a first date there are things that can be blurted out that ought to have been left unblurted. If there are skeletons in your closet, try to keep the closet door shut. When I was an archaeologist, I literally had a skeleton in my closet, and it cost me a relationship.
In an interview, DON’T SAY BAD THINGS ABOUT YOUR FORMER BOSS.
5. Don’t forget important facts.
Remember your date’s name
Remember your perspective employer’s name.
I once had an interview. The prospective employer called me later to say that I DID NOT GET THE JOB. Then she asked me on a date. See … you always win – you just never know what the prize is going to be.
Mike Broderick , a one- time archaeologist, is a Vocational Rehabilitation Counsellor with the Fraser Health Authority in Port Coquitlam where he helps people with mental health disabilities find and keep full or part time employment .
He WAS the Employment Specialist for the Neil Squire Society in Burnaby where he found employment for people with physical disabilities, A Supported Employment Coordinator at THEO BC (now the Open Door Group), and a case manager at Community Fisheries Development Centre where he helped people move from the fishing industry to something else because there, “Aint no fish.” This means he is VERY familiar with how a modern day resume should look.
He is a newly retired ambassador with the Vancouver Board of Trade and a former member of the Labour Task Force of the Burnaby Board of Trade He does some work as a field Archaeologist, is a fitness instructor and frequent contributor of fitness humour articles to Alive Magazine. He is always saying, “If you can’t be fit, you can at least be funny.”
He lives in Port Coquitlam with his spouse Cecelia. You can reach him at home at firstname.lastname@example.org or at 604-464-4105. If you’re looking for a career change, he is the Spin Doctor and can give you a resume makeover at competitive rates.